An Alien In My Own Family

I had always been the black sheep of the family, almost like an alien.... maybe I was a half-breed alien.... you know, when people get abducted by aliens and impregnated by them.... the abductee becomes pregnant.... and the baby is born.... I could almost believe my mother being an abductee, the way she is at times..... and the orange light came to check up on me.....

Well that is probably a bit too far fetched.... but sometimes I do wonder.... I always thought I had been adopted.... I never quite belonged to my family.... always the odd one out.

Whatever this orange light was doing.... or whatever it means.... one thing for sure is that events would follow that would make me even more of an "alien" in my family...

Working on the assumption the orange light came in Easter 1980.....

It was September 1980 when the wedding of my mother and her boyfriend happened.... the day coincided with Elul 25 on the lunar calendar, the day when according to Jewish lore the world was created by God.

Soon after they were on their honeymoon in Europe, spend two months there over October and November 1980.

During that time, my elder sister became my guardian.... she is only two years my senior, but far above that according to mum. Back in my younger years when mum had to work at night, my sister was my babysitter and it was a nightmare.

My sister would dob me in for things I never done, and despite my pleas of innocence mum would never believe me.... and I would always get into trouble for things I have never done.

So now the nightmare returns.... mum away in Europe for two months, and me under the "care" of my sister.

On this occasion, my sister had her own problems. She was in a relationship, and always fighting with her boyfriend, a very turbulent relationship. It seemed she was too preoccupied to cause me much trouble.

And on top of that, she was having an affair with a guy at her work. One night on her birthday she stayed out all night with him, and it was her boyfriend who watched over me, not that I really needed watching, I was 17 for goodness sakes!!!

It turned out this was the night my sister fell pregnant to this man at work. Soon after, she broke off from her boyfriend, and ended up marrying the guy from work.

Not long after mum returned from her trip with new step-dad, which would have been around Xmas 1980, mum announced her pregnancy!! At around the same time, my sister announced her pregnancy!! It turned out they both conceived at about the same time!

And in spite of the circumstances, my sister's pregnancy was greeted with joy. This might sound horrible, but if I had slept with a girl for a fling and gotten her pregnant, I would have been put through the grille.... mum being the traditionalist that she was.... But it didn't happen for my sister, yet another episode where my sister would get away with stuff that I would never have gotten away with!!!

My sister got married in 1981 and went to Sydney with her husband. Mum gave birth to my brother late in July 1981.... my niece was born in Sydney two weeks later.

My brother's birth occured during "The Three Weeks" between Tzom Tammuz and Tish'a B'av, the period of time when historically various disasters and calamities had befallen the Jewish people including the destruction of the two Temples. Perhaps this is why my brother turned out to be a problem child, and caused difficulties for me while I was trying to study for my degree.

My niece was born just after this Three Weeks period, but she wasn't a problem.

Only that mum and my sister had grown that much closer together, and me that much further apart from my family.... more of a black sheep.... more of an alien.

An alien in my own family.....